I shared a piece on October 8th about the shootings that keep happening in our country in Thoughts on Vegas, and Why Men Keep Doing This – Be Yourself . This was a very interesting read on men in our society and why they keep doing these atrocious things. It also mentioned a few things to read, watch, or join to learn more, grow, or fix things. One of them was a film The Mask You Live In . I watched this over the weekend and cried. It is so telling what we have done to our boys. How confusing it is to “be a man” in our world.

I saw my son so many times. He is so not a typical boy. He had two older sisters. He and the middle kid are so close. He would play dolls with her. She took tap and ballet so he wanted to take tap and ballet. He did that for three years. The first year at three, he was the only boy. The second and third year, he was joined by his best friend. They quit when the school closed. He started playing the violin at five. He also played flag football for three years. He enjoyed it but after the third year, he said he was done with football. He wanted to be a Bronco and the team was the Broncos that year so he reached his goal. When he started Kindergarten his favorite color was pink. He had the classroom bully tell him that he was not allowed to like pink. This same bully picked on him for years. I didn’t know about much of the bullying because my son never told us but the middle kiddo would tell us. He also had a couple of real good friends that always stood up for him. One was his girlfriend. She was so cute. She would threaten to beat up all the boys that picked on him. I am sure that didn’t help matters but she always had his back. They are still friends to this day. The other was his jock best friend. They are so different but are like brothers. As the years went on, my son became an avid reader, brain, reader, and very sensitive. In high school, he got into band and theater. My son has never been a stereotypical boy and is now finding his way as a man that doesn’t fit the stereotypical male in our society.

This film delves into what being a man is and how our society tries to stifle the “feminine” side of them.  We need to change the way we raise our boys and what we expect from them. There are men like my son. There are men like his best friend, the jock. They both are very sensitive young men and have been allowed to be this way due to their mothers. Both of them had fathers that are the more “macho” men that were raised to not show emotions. Not all men are as lucky as our boys. Many are still raised to not show emotions. Those men are damaged. They have difficulties in so many aspects of their lives, even if they don’t see it themselves. Many become lonely, angry, and unsatisfied in life. Many end up much worse- abusers, controllers, killers, etc. We need to let our boys be who they are and express their own interests and feelings. I think anyone that influences boys in our world should watch this film. I would love to hear your opinions on this film after you watch it.

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