Well, today was quite interesting. I have been feeling sorry for myself most of the day, which all us depressed people know is so good for us. On the way home from work, my husband mentioned that we would need to take separate cars tomorrow cuz he is going to Farmington after work. My initial reaction was quiet but inside I was churning and wondering why he couldn’t ask me to go with him and we make a night of it. I didn’t know how to say something without being too emotional so I sat there and listened to the radio most of the way home. Finally, just about 5 miles from home, I said to him that maybe we could go to Farmington together and go to dinner. His response was quite non-chalant and yea we could possibly do that. I didn’t hear a definite yes or no so was wondering how to feel about all this.

As I was fixing dinner, my eldest daughter and hubby got into a huge fight that continued into dinner and I got sucked in. I tried so hard to stay out of it but neither of them would let me. Next thing I know is we are discussing us and the kids are gone. We haven’t talked about us for weeks so it was probably a good thing.  It ended with me asking if he would mind checking the air in my bike tires since he was going outside. I told him that if we weren’t going to ride together tomorrow, I was going to ride my motorcycle. He said, well make up your mind what we are doing, so I guess we have a date that will entail more than watching a movie. I am excited but do not want to get my hopes up.

So, I am sitting here with mixed emotions yet looking forward to tomorrow evening but scared to death of spending it alone with him for hours, too. Wish me well. I hope that it goes well.

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